Nov 28
When parents ask you …
“Hey, did you get home safely?”
“No, I died, like, four times on my way.”
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Nov 27
My mom doesn’t like it when I eat on the bed but I do it anyway
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Nov 27
Coming into the bathroom after someone took a massive dump
“Motherf*cker didn’t even use air freshener!”
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Nov 27
When your parents actually let you do something they wouldn’t let you do before.
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